The Storyteller E-zine

Here is a bedtime story  as it was told  to me , over and over, by my babysitter, when I was a boy in Kentucky.  

On Things That Go Bump In The Night

One eve afore a holiday, well most in my family found most days a holiday, that is -that most 'o the men took to making there way in the world by doing the odd job, choppin'' trees, making or runnin' shine or hunting what ever critter was unlucky enough to come pass close by the homestead. We was having a picnic so most 'o the kin were over for a feed and a snort or two- since it were a holiday comin ' next day. It was a particular warm day and the bugs were fierce so by the time the sun went down most of us were on the porch. Now we are good Christian women so we don't abide shine being drunk in our presence. Now don't get me wrong we pray for the souls of our men folk every Sunday, but they are a stiff necked bunch -good in their way. Now some of the men fell prey to the evil of drink so we women made arrangements for the afflicted wives to stay over, so as to avoid any trouble later. Now by this time all was quiet and some had fallen asleep, natural and from drink, but it were real quiet.

I was just enjoyin' the moment when a bright light comes down like the heavens had opened up. I thought it was a helliocopter- they been around sniffin' out hemp plants. A couple hollers over the Mc Bride bunch got pinched by Feds for growin' female hemp. Government needs to stay out of folks business says I, not that I abide the smoking of that nasty weed. Tea's better thing for those with the anxiousness. Too much buts you right back in the pot you are  a-climbing out of. If you get my meaning. They was a bad bunch, good riddance, says I. , 'cept for cousin Becky, bless her heart, she married in. The heart wants what it wants, I always say. So this light shines on down brighter than any thing man has made and a big 'ole thing-silver and gold comes down easy as you please. It makes this loud squeal like a hog not liking the idea of it's neck being slit- but louder. Well it wakes all the men-folk up and they is a- cursing like there ain't no judgement-a-comin'. Now it must be the size of a barn and this door opens up on the underside and these little folk come pouring out. Now I been told all my life about the little folk, my kin bein' from the Ireland and I swear I seen some hereabout but these weren't them, They was skinny with big ole heads. Eyes big and midnight black- they was small too. They was like little ten year olds that ain't ate well in months. Any way they comes pourin' out and the men start hollering and fetching their guns. Soon guns is a-firing and there are yells all about. We women ran inside and locked the door. I stood outside with my pistol just in case one comes for me. Now I was standing on the step and something grapped my hair and begins to pull me up right off the porch.  You can see I am not a frail woman, maybe a bit overfed-so when I tell you that skinny beast on the roof is lifting me like I was a doll it means somethin'. I starts to scream and my son see's me and lifts his gun. He must have hit the thing 'cause there is this pop and I falls to the ground. I ran inside not too bad hurt. 

Things get real crazy then. These things are wrapping on the windows-every window in the house. I look outside and I see's little critters running helter skelter everywhere. I see's them on the roof of the barn, the light from their ship putting back shining on them. I seen two a-draggin' Cousin Shep, by his hair, across the lawn. There is guns going off and I see puffs of smoke and flashes where the critters gets shot. It were like a scene from hell. This goes on about four hours, pretty near dawn. Then they climbs in their ship and off they goes-straight up and away, quick as you please, and gone.

When we all got together, thank the Lord, no one was missing and no one was badly hurt. There was a bone broken here and there. Mostly it was cuts, scratches, and a whole lot of bruising. I can tell you there was not one soul weren't sober and clear minded. We don't know what it was that happened but we did call the Sheriff, him being a good man and friendly toward our family. He took some samples and had some fancy schooled men come out with their gadgets. They came back saying that they found some interesting things and such. I don't know whether anyone believed us but God surely knows.

Now here is the part no one knows. Some of the women started to have some dreams they kept from the men. The younger girls begin to remember being taken in to the ship and was looked at in a way only a Doctor and a newly wed man should. The older gals took it for a kind of shock. But nine months goes by and each gal that had them dreams ended up pregnant and gave easy birth to the prettiest babies you ever seen. Each one smart as a whip. We women keep to ourselves on this matter. If you tell we will call you, before the Alter, a liar.

Men folk in the family says they was men from Mars but we gals come to believe, for the blessing of those children,  that they was angels and so say I.

That's the story-more or less. 1955 near Hopkinsville  Kentucky.

I had seen recently on the sci-fi channel that a similar event did happen in that area and  about that time I always thought that she was telling us a real story.

Ken Lehnig